PTSD, Brain Spotting, and EMDR

Brain-spotting was an interesting therapeutic experience. I’d never heard of it before my counselor suggested it. I guess you could describe it as one step down from hypnosis.

Kate had me relax in a cozy chair with my feet propped. She instructed me to find a spot on the ceiling or wall that I could focus on throughout the exercise.

Meditation music played in the background. The lights were low, and there were essential oils in a diffuser.

She spoke in a soft, soothing tone and began with, “Tell me about the first time you remember feeling sad.”

Then she asked me what one word I would give to past-me if I could pass on a word of wisdom.

We moved from sad to angry, from angry to afraid, from afraid to happy.

I don’t hold back in therapy, and I’m fairly honest with myself, so I had no trouble tapping into those early memories and accounting for my emotional triggers.

When we were about 45 minutes in, Kate brought me back into the present moment by directing me to wiggle my fingers and toes. She turned up the lights and turned down the music and then handed me an index card.

On the index card were words written in random order. Some words went left to right, others went up and down, and some were diagonal. It was a collection of the words I’d given her during the session. She told me to put it on the mirror where I get ready every day so I can glance at it often.

I don’t have it anymore, that was years ago, but I wish I’d saved it. That card gave me a comfort I cannot explain. It almost felt like time travel where I gave younger me the hope she needed to push through. All I had to do was look at that card, and I’d feel calm.

I don’t see that therapist anymore; I moved, but I’ve been seeing another for the past two years. I love her. I trust her.

My step-daughter was also diagnosed with PTSD, and her therapist suggested that she go through a treatment called EMDR, but then canceled on the day of because the therapist said it was too dangerous based on my step-daughter’s current state of mind.

I asked my counselor about that treatment, and she didn’t recommend it. She said she doesn’t practice it…